Well, yes. It does seem that way. But is it really? We probably all know people who made a serious connection--perhaps even met their spouse--through the Internet, either on an online dating site, or on Facebook, or through other online communities. There's a lot to be said for the combination of introverts and the Internet for making love connections.
But is it really? We probably all know people who made a serious connection--perhaps even met their spouse--through the Internet, either why an online dating site, or on Facebook, or through other online communities.
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There's a lot to be said for the combination of introverts and the Internet for making love connections. First of all, it's the only way that love might find you in us living room.
You don't even have to leave the house at first. Second, introverts tend to be comfortable with, and good at, expressing ourselves in writing.
Third, communicating online first, before meeting, can be an easy way through all the awkward preliminary chitchat. Doug and his now-wife learned even more about each other reading each other's blogs.
Of course, like anything else, there are ways and ways to go about online dating. So let's talk a little about using online dating sites like Match or eHarmony.
Internet dating is the only way you might find love without leaving the house.
For one thing, it helps to know what you're looking for. That's not to say you want a stringent and inflexible list of must-haves, but go into it with at least a rough idea so that you're not succumbing to what online dating coach Kimberly Dawn Neumann calls "supermarket syndrome"—filling your cart with everyone who seems even wigh plausible, until you become overwhelmed. And stipulate for yourself a certain number of hours a week that you will spend on reviewing profiles and responding to emails, so that it datinf become yet another job on your to-do list.
You want to make sure your profile accurately represents you.
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No lying! Maybe, maybe you can fudge your age a little bit to turn up in a different search bracket, Kimberly says, but you have to 'fess up in the first email. You can tell yourself the other person will get over your lie once they get to know the wonderfulness that is you, but they won't. Mostly they'll start off not trusting you right off the bat.
And be sure to feature some of your charming idiosyncrasies in your profile—your unusual hobbies and particular passions. Yeah, yeah, romantic dinners and travel. Who doesn't like those things?
But you don't want to blend into the crowd, so be sure to mention your pet ferret or competitive fencing medals or lifelong desire to walk across Siberia. Rebecca, an introvert us met her introverted husband online, was drawn again and again to his profile photo of himself hugging a horse. An animal lover herself, she recognized a kindred spirit.
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She also liked that shy was articulate, witty, could spell, and paid attention to what she said in her emails, all indicating he was the kind of man she had in mind. You can be upfront with your introversion —if the more isn't the merrier for you, you might as well say so. At the same time, you probably shouldn't be responding to people whose profiles are full of party pics.
Some introverts are particularly attracted to extroverts and that's fine, but if partying is such a big part of a person's life that they use it to represent themselves, then the prognosis for an introvert's relationship with that person is not good. And a particular caveat for introverts: If you think you're starting to click with someone, brother let the emailing drag on and on, no matter how much you enjoy it.
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